Rosemary Rogers said, First romance, first love, is something so special to all of us, both emotionally and physically, that it touches our lives and enriches them forever.
First loves are as sweet as they are unexpected. They make us vulnerable even while they make us feel as if we are invincible giving us a strength to match the riding high of emotion. It connects with the deepest, most sensual areas of the brain conforming its paradigms to that experience.
Memories of first love are always tumultuous. Very few experiences in our lives are as intense and overwhelming. They come to us at a time when we are emotional virgins and take us by surprise. There is no warning, no foreword, and no experience to counter the onslaught of emotions that become us. They shape our perspective about the affair and define love for us in a way that stays with us even in the future when we have more hindsight. George Bernard Shaw held that first love is a little foolish and a lot of curiosity. This might be true as in a lot of cases. First loves, by design, usually don’t last. It could be that they mostly happen at times when parental pressure, peer pressure, academic stresses, societal obligations etc. play an important role in our life. Most people, when reunited with their first loves, their couple doesn’t last which proves that most probably it’s the high of the feeling that makes the experience so unforgettable.
Psychologists compare first loves to ‘Imprinting’ which, in Biology is the biological bond made by living beings in a sensitive period of their life. Ducklings for example, start following whatever moving object they see after hatching. They relate this theory of imprinting to humans in such a way, saying that adolescence is that sensitive period for all of us and we imprint to the one who gives us importance and center our entire life around them. This however, is countered by the study that not everyone experiences first love in this period of their life. Also, with the fact that not everyone is strung up on this bond as others. Some people are happy to move on from the feeling, chalking it up as a learning experience. It’s not that these people did not experience the same; just that they let it go. That is where we have the power, the choice to hold on to it and desensitize the experience or to keep the magic inside us forever and let it go. The power to grow magnificent wings; and fly…
Whatever the case with first loves might be, whether it happens after a string of lovers at the age of thirty or as a virgin at fifteen, they consume you and no matter how much time passes, they stay with you even when you don’t care anymore. You might fall in love again and be very happy about it but there is something about the innocence of discovering the art of living for others for the very first time that marks you deeper than anything else has the power to do so. They take us to a time when the world was spread before us for us to explore and we thought anything was possible. It’s love in its unadulterated form. It might not last forever, it might not withstand the trials of time or be ever growing but in a moment of time, it is our whole world and in that moment, we are infinite.